Some people may pass off their bullying behaviour with “it’s just my personality” not realising that the person on the other end sees it quite different.
- What are some of the common bullying behaviours?
- What are some of the warning signs to look for?
You are oblivious to your meanness.
It may not be overtly intentional but the words you choose and the way you vocalise them can rub others the wrong way. While you may feel you are only expressing the truth as you understand it, it’s not what you say but how you say it that leaves the lasting impression. Choose your words carefully and verbalise them with discretion.
You are a master manipulator.
You work behind the scenes and attempt to orchestrate things in your favour or desired outcome. It may be to freeze someone else out or get what you want by pitting one person or group against another. This type of behaviour drives wedges and destroys trust. The philosophy is driven by a jealousy that says if you can’t get what you want then neither will the other person.
You are a gossip and a busybody.
While you may think you are just keeping up with the latest office news you might want to stop and consider the consequences. There is no virtue in gossiping about others and being in everyone else’s business. If you can’t be trusted with other people’s personal business then how can you be trusted with company business?
You are a control freak.
Similar in style to the manipulator your objective is not so much about the performance of others but to control others. You are overbearing with expectations and demands and it’s simply a way to throw your weight around.
You are two-faced.
This is a common characteristic of a bully. You pretend to be one thing in public but are something else in private. You confide to a colleague in private and then throw them under the bus in public.
Time for some honest evaluation.
- Have you in the past or are you now displaying any of the above mentioned behaviours?
- Do you notice that people tend to avoid you at work?
- Have you taken stock of how you treat others and look for ways to improve your people skills?
- Would you consider asking for help in identifying areas that need improvement?
Until you take ownership of a bullying past or present then being a bully will likely be a part of your future. Take steps now to stop it. You have a lot to lose if you don’t and everything to gain if you get it right.
Practical Help and Advice for employees dealing with bullying at work
As an employer you have a ‘Duty of Care’ to provide a safe and stress-free place of work for all employees. Unfortunately workplace bullying and anti social behaviour resulting in stress is a fact of life for too many workers in Leeds.
Unlike their playground equivalents work place bullies and their supporters tend not to use physical abuse. Instead they resort to long term psychological intimidation which can be just as devastating for the person on the receiving end.
The National Bullying Helpline is committed to provide FREE practical advice and guidance, on a confidential basis, relating to any concern or dispute in the workplace. Our advisers are CIPD trained and have specialist skills in conflict resolution.
CALL 0300 323 0169
Open 9am to 5pm Monday to Friday | firstname.lastname@example.org
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